In this day and age where we have quick and easy access to dates on Tinder, Hinge, Coffee Meets Bagel, OK Cupid, POF and oh so many more…it’s pretty darn easy to get distracted.
It’s easy to brush off a potential mate with the mentality that you can just go home after your date and start swiping all over again.
Or – just pick up and continue the conversation you were having with someone else right before. Stop lying, we’ve all been there and done that.
But are we really giving each other a fair shot? Are we really putting in a genuine effort?
There are so many of us singles out there, claiming that we want to be in a relationship – that we want to find The One.
But, I have to wonder, have we gotten so overwhelmed with options that we no longer give each other a fair shot in this game we call dating?
While having a wide variety of choice is usually ideal, (hello – buffets are amazing, am I right?) too many choices in dating can lead to a lack of activity and effort.
You can lose track of time while swiping left and right, match after match – with no activity. I’m guilty of this myself.
With over 400 matches on Tinder, (yes – ridiculous, I know) – I can honestly say that maybe 25% of them have initiated contact.
The others sit there, quiet, some like the moments I share on Tinder…others – nothing.
Have we become so lazy when it comes to dating that we can no longer even make the effort to send a message, or worse – even respond to one that’s been sent to us?
This incredibly cute girl on Tinder keeps liking my ‘moments’ I share, but then doesn’t reply to a message. How frustrating!
— Zach Bussey (@zachbussey) September 15, 2015
With a plethora of choices, people are scared to commit to just one, so we don’t. We keep our options open, chat with multiple people at once – maybe even date more than one person at a time.
We are left with the thought that if Person A doesn’t work out, we have Person B and Person C to fall back on – instead of putting in the full effort with Person A.
Are we being too picky or choosy? I don’t think so – I think that there is just too much choice.
So much so that we are constantly left second guessing ourselves and the choices we do eventually make.
We start second guessing our choices because we have set these unrealistic high expectations for our potential mates.
Expectations often lead to disappointment.
With so many choices to choose from – we set these ridiculous standards in the hopes of finding someone literally perfect.
Spoiler Alert – no one is perfect.
Relationships take work; relationships take compromise.
So maybe, just maybe the grass isn’t always greener on the other side and maybe we should take the time to care for our own lawn and watch it grow into something healthy.